captainsnoop:

i wish other countries treated their prominent historical figures with the same level of bizarre irreverence that japan treats theirs with 

like in japan i could probably walk in to the bic camera store and pick up five different video games with date masamune in them. they’re all different genres. three of them let you fuck nobunaga. 

can you go to target and buy a video game where you can fuck george washington? how many video games are there where abraham lincoln shoots people? like one or two? all i can think of is Codename STEAM and the less said about that game the better. wheres my dynasty warriors that has John Henry in it??? japan will sell me a game where the fifth emperor of rome wants to hop on this dick but i can’t find a SINGLE game at walmart where i have a strategic pokemon battle with george washington carver. i can pokemon battle hattori hanzo! he has a spiritomb! it’s not fair!